SELF TALK

Happy new week friends,

I look forward to sharing with you Brilliant and Excellent tips for attaining your goals, fulfilling your Purpose and making the world a better place.

Relax!”, “Stay calm!!”, “Eyes on the ball”, “Keep focused!!!”

These words are familiar I guess you can relate. Either from a coach, a spectator or as self-talk. Sometimes I wish I could accompany these words with a dirty slap or knock on my head whenever I make the wrong moves.

Research indicates that people, on average, speak to themselves at a rate of between 300 and 1,000 words per minute. 

self-talk, constant internal dialogue is a powerful tool that affects us all, directing how we feel, which subsequently influences our behavior and actions.

It is not difficult to realize that we have voices in our head. The real trick is figuring out what type of self- talk you have, how beneficial or destructive it is to your performance and then changing it, if needs be, to work to your advantage.

Self-talk is one of the main performance enhancement techniques athletes use to increase performance. It is also one of the easiest to understand but also the most difficult to incorporate and to maintain training.  It has also been widely endorsed as a performance enhancement tool in the sport psychology literature. Implementing self-talk interventions successfully, however, requires some understanding of how, when, why, and for whom self-talk interventions are likely to be effective.

Self-talk comes about when the mind is exposed to a particular situation and decides to voice it’s inner thoughts, whether positive or negative. Positive self-talk can increase adrenaline levels and refocus the mind. They increase confidence and reinforce self-belief while returning the state, mind, and body back your optimal performance level.

Mental training requires practice and as such, Self-talk can only be effective if practiced on a regular basis.   

To train the mind to engage in positive talks looks straight forward on paper but requires techniques and practice. Our thoughts, our emotions, and our actions can be influenced if we practice and train this aspect of mental training.

Practice makes us determine the effectiveness of our own identified self-talk, also when and how it can be effectively applied to a different individual.

“Idiot!!”, “How can you?!!” What the hell was that? These words may seem negative to some people but effective for some.

For me, some of the phrases I use appear negative but for me, they actually act as motivational cues for when I am extremely stressed. However, the timing of these phrases matters.

We also need to learn to listen to themselves. Our thoughts will definitely shed some light on you as individuals give us all the clues on how to direct further mental training for our performance.

Self-talk can either be positive or negative. While positive thoughts will produce positive emotional reactions, such as excitement, determination, and relaxation, On the other hand, negative thoughts will harvest negative emotional reactions like anxiety, sadness, and hopelessness

Self-talk produces a physical response which results in physical reactions. We may try the famous psychologist Albert Ellis’s ABC model.​

In conclusion, the way we address our phrases is important than the phrase itself,

For instance, imagine yourself playing in a high profile match and screaming to yourself “Relax!”, “Stay calm!!”, and “Keep focused!!!” – even though these words are positive, the overall effect of your inner dialogue is negative.

The tone of your phrase is just as important as the actual words, so pay attention to both the phrase and the tone.

For more details, you can contact the BPE team @ www.solomonempire.com or download BPE tool app on google play store.

To be a member of the BPE team of Solomon’s Empire, kindly send a mail to bpe@solomonempire.com

 

STEP OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE

Happy new week friends,

I look forward to sharing with you Brilliant and Excellent tips for attaining your goals, fulfilling your Purpose and making the world a better place.

I was surprised to see repeated missed calls from a friend. Our last conversation was over 6months and I remember the compliments he gave me. “You now have a very good body structure, you are really determined”.

I used to be in the same drinking club with Charles where we gather after our long day at work to drink a minimum of 4 bottles of beer before going home. And although it was always fun discussing, laughing and drinking, we consumed more bottles than we ever worked out. 

Later on, I started a project which needed me to work with a completely different set of people. Our meeting time, unfortunately, coincides with the time I spend with my friends drinking. Because the project was more important to me, I had to meet up with them for 3 months. We held our meetings at one of the sports facility within our community. Whenever I got there, I had to wait for them to finish their sessions before we got started. Eventually, I decided to join the sessions rather than waiting and this was one of the best decisions I made.

Three months after, we concluded the project and to my surprise, I had to do a complete change of wardrobe as I realized that I had lost major calories and my clothes were not fitted. I visited my old friends and they were all amazed at my transformation.  Yes, it was not that my new friends do not drink but they were more disciplined and were conscious of their intake and their energy conversion rate.

While others simply commented, Charles was motivated to plan to also curb his excesses. He was actually calling me this weekend to show off his new body structure.

Friends, it is not business as usual. We need to hang around people who will give our lives more meaning and take us out of our comfort zones. A popular quote says, “You never change your life until you step out of your comfort zone; change begins at the end of your comfort zone.” ― Roy T. Bennett.

Our comfort zone is not a place of growth, it is not a place of advancement. The man especially will mostly not make any contributory change in his life except forced to, which is why, sometimes, when adversity comes, they are blessings in disguise because they push us to the next new thing that we otherwise would not have reached for were the adversity not there.

Some kinds of friends bring out the best in us, some don’t. it is the responsibility of each man to ensure that he surrounds himself with the right kind of people, people who model the future he has in mind for himself or people who are also on their way there. Nothing exists in isolation, every great invention was the result of minds working together and so is every great stupidity.

Image result for comfort zone

Also, when something is good, feels good and has value in it, nobody tries to hide it. As a salesman, when you’re trying to get a client to buy a product you know will soon become the most sought after, you don’t run after the client, you don’t become beggarly and helpless. In your conversation will be confidence and show-off. This same is true for men, in this case, we ourselves are the products. Working on ourselves brings out the gold in each of us, once the gold becomes visible, our confidence level shoots up, our approach to life changes, our attitude changes, our conversation changes and so is the kind of people we move with. When I started to see how the sessions I was attending with my new partners were making a difference in me, both physically and mentally, I stayed committed to it, and when the reward came, I sought out my old friends and showed off a little. I wanted them to see the reward of my diligence. The same with Charles, my friend, his plan to curb his drinking excesses and commit to a healthy lifestyle must be paying off and now, he cants wait to show it to other people.

Getting out of your comfort zone towards your dreams, and persevering in the face of adversity until the reward is visible to everyone will get any individual far in life. Comfort zones are comfortable, so it will not be easy at first, almost impossible but stay with it, if you do, the reward will be far worth it in the end.

For more details, you can contact the BPE team @ www.solomonempire.com or download BPE tool app on google play store.

To be a member of the BPE team of Solomon’s Empire, kindly send a mail to bpe@solomonempire.com

THE RAT TRAP

Happy new week friends,

I look forward to sharing with you Brilliant and Excellent tips for attaining your goals, fulfilling your Purpose and making the world a better place.

I’ve been thinking about this story and have concluded that I needed to share the story for the moral lesson it teaches that we can all learn from.

The story is that of a man who owns a farm on which the wife rears animals. She owns a goat, cow, hen, and rat. Each of her animals has a separate mini house which she cleans every morning. She also has a help who comes in from time to time to help out in caring for the animals. The animals are so used to this family that they never really wander away from home without finding their way back.

The woman on the other hand also loves her animals, she often allows them free entry and exit into the main house. She reckons that by doing this, the animals get to be more used to her and her family.

One day, the woman started to notice her food storage deplete, without touching it, portions of food were getting missing and she had no idea what was going on. She questioned her animals, each of them, very deeply but each denied, saying they had no idea what was going on and they do not know anything about the missing food. This went on for some time until the woman decided that she would investigate the matter by herself. She headed to the local store and bought herself a trap.

On her return, the rat caught sight of her and called a meeting among the other animals, “we need to find out what’s going on with the missing food.” He said

“Why?” The cow asked. “I am not responsible for it, my hands are clean.”

“So is mine.” The goat gloated.

“I don’t have time.” The hen said and cocked away.

“Wait” shouted the rat. “Our master has gone to buy a trap, I saw her, let’s discuss this before something bad happens.” He pleaded but nobody listened to her.

“I’ll be here when the trap destroys your right foot.” The cow mocked. “Let me be.” He scolded. Traps are for rats.

Unaware of what was going on among her animals, the wife set up the trap and went to bed. In the midnight, she awoke to a strange noise and decided to check, alas, her trap had caught the culprit. It was a snake.

The snake was so furious about the trap that it bit the woman before it was killed. Now the woman was hospitalized and needed medical attention. Her husband began to spend out of their savings and her condition improved slightly. The Doctor then called him and told him to get his wife a bowl of soup as she was beginning to gain an appetite. But the husband had run out of money. So, he went home and killed the hen to make chicken soup for his wife. But then, her condition became worse and they needed more money to treat her, so the husband went home and killed the goat, sold it meat by meat in order to pay his wife’s hospital bills. Eventually, the woman died.

The man now had to think of funeral expenses, the cow was used for the funeral.

Only the rat was left, wishing that the other animals had listened to him when he called their attention.

In this story is some insight I would like to share:

  1. Never think of a matter as insignificant: Perhaps if the cow, the goat, and the hen had listened when the rat raised concern over the missing food, they may have been able to see what the woman wasn’t seeing and intervened, thereby saving their lives and that of their master’s.
  2. Be open to new information: even if the information doesn’t concern us, it may be a good tip-off to someone who really needs to hear it. Take every information as a gift that you can give to help other people.
  3. Never assume: the other animals obviously think that the rat was responsible for the missing food and were all waiting to see him get caught in the trap so they could mock him. As a rule of thumb, whenever a situation is going on that you don’t understand, never assume. First, find out the facts and base your judgment on that. If you are unable to find out the facts, then don’t take any decision.
  4. Always Listen: Listening is a vital skill that can help you grow wiser. People who listen are able to gain understanding very fast than people who talk too much. Listening also helps to know the true intent of the speaker beyond what was spoken. Listening involves watching body languages such as the movement of the hands, the emotion behind the voice, the mannerism and co.

I hope that you find these lessons insightful and can begin to implement it in what you do. Can you identify other lessons from the story? Kindly comment below and we will add them.

For more details, you can contact the BPE team @ www.solomonempire.com or download BPE tool app on google play store.

To be a member of the BPE team of Solomon’s Empire, kindly send a mail to bpe@solomonempire.com

Love and Respect

Happy new week friends,

I look forward to sharing with you Brilliant and Excellent tips for attaining your goals, fulfilling your Purpose and making the world a better place.

I listened to a Catholic Parish priest’s sermon this weekend sharing several stories and experiences. This one got me and I have decided to share it with you today. He shared a story of how he got to meet a couple at the gym. The husband was a Buddhist and the wife was a Christian. The Man who was a Buddhist complained to him about so many atrocities committed by Christians and how they discourage people with their characters, action, and words. This is not the story. Now the most interesting part was this; the Buddhist invited the priest to his house for dinner and after dinner, they decided to pray. The priest was invited into the family’s praying closet where they have an altar, on the altar, he noticed that the statue of Jesus and that of Buddha were hanged side by side on the altar. The priest asked the Buddhist why he did this and he responded, “If Jesus and Buddha cannot leave together in peace, then how do you expect myself and my wife to live together in peace and harmony’’.

Although there is some humor in that story, the truth is that in many ways we have lost our tolerance for each other. Regardless of religion or tribe, in our core, we all are human with the same basic needs and affection. In the story above, a representation of Jesus and Buddha standing side by side represent two people although with different thoughts and ideals of life yet are in many ways not different except in opinion.

Image result for love and respect

Love and Respect then must be the strongest force there is on the earth. A singular force so strong it can overcome the prevailing idiosyncrasy and cause two mutually exclusive people to be on the same level of love and having a deep connection to their humanity. Although we were not told how many years these couples have been together, it is obvious that despite the varying ideals of each other’s religion, they have managed to stay together happily.

And that is the way I believe things can advance at whatever level, a small team, a group, or an institution. It is moving beyond the things that hold us back and focusing on the very things that bring us together- our shared humanity.

The principle of Love and respect is universal, it is beyond the simple need to live together, it is simply advancing our relationship with other people based not on our deferring opinion or lifestyle but based on how we want to be treated as humans primarily.

For more details, you can contact the BPE team @ www.solomonempire.com or download BPE tool app on google play store.

To be a member of the BPE team of Solomon’s Empire, kindly send a mail to bpe@solomonempire.com

Challenging-the-status-quo

Happy new week friends,

I look forward to sharing with you Brilliant and Excellent tips for attaining your goals, fulfilling your Purpose and making the world a better place.

Isaac Newton’s The Philosophiae Naturalis Principia Mathematica is widely considered one of the most important scientific books ever written, and for good reason. It has been studied, referenced, and quoted countless times in the 300-plus years since it was first published. That is what makes it even more astounding that it contained a simple mathematical error all this time.

The error is only superficial, having no consequences, but it’s amazing that it was somehow overlooked for hundreds of years. Out of all the people who examined Newton’s writings, many of whom were geniuses in their own right, it was a 23 year old student named Robert Garisto who discovered the mistake. https://listverse.com/2014/07/30/10-scientific-blunders-of-genius-minds/

When we talk about either personal or system change, it is about changing critically examining the present and existing ways of doing things and trying to understand the logic behind it. The genius will not stop at that but will find alternative ways to achieve the same or better result.  

We all have bright ideas that may worth billions but we may not have the courage to effect these changes or share the ideas. https://coschedule.com

While there are mega mindset shifts that need to take place, the real work is in acting. Ideas do not equal change. If it did, we could change the world with a quick Google search. And millions of people would suddenly realize…

“Oh, wow! All I need to do to lose weight is to eat healthier and exercise!”

✓ Problem solved.

“Our team keeps missing our KPI targets because we haven’t hit a deadline in weeks. It’s so simple, let’s just hit our deadlines!”

✓ Results skyrocket. You’re instantly promoted.

Obviously, it doesn’t work like this.

Just because we know the right things doesn’t mean we do the right things. This means challenging the status quo will mean more than our ideas and head knowledge. It’ll mean different actions than those that created today’s state of affairs. And this is precisely where your value and leverage enters the picture.

For more details, you can contact the BPE team @ www.solomonempire.com or download BPE tool app on google play store.

To be a member of the BPE team of Solomon’s Empire, kindly send a mail to bpe@solomonempire.com

POSTS

POSTED ONJUNE 25, 2019EDIT”BEAUTY AND THE BEAST- A METAPHOR FOR TIME IN RELATIONSHIPS”

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST- A METAPHOR FOR TIME IN RELATIONSHIPS

Happy new week friends,

I look forward to sharing with you Brilliant and Excellent tips for attaining your goals, fulfilling your Purpose and making the world a better place.

Beauty and the Beast is one cartoon that we are all familiar with in some way. The story line is such that a young beautiful girl, Belle embarked on a trip to save her father from a hideous Beast named Gaston. This Beast however was not always a Beast, at some point in his life, he was a handsome prince, cursed by an old witch who turned him to a hideous Beast. Now Beauty does not know the history of the Beast, she did not know that he wasn’t born a Beast, Beauty did not know that he was once a handsome prince with loyal servants and a vibrant kingdom. All that Beauty knows is the present; a hideous Beast with very bad attitude and a anger that erupts very quick.

The story line took a turn when Beauty became patient with Gaston and went on a journey of discovery, finding out from the characters in the house, the kind of person he was, why he was always angry and sad at the same time. The best part of the movie was when Beauty realized who Gaston was in his core. The moment Beauty realized that beyond all the aggression and ugliness on the surface, there was beauty and joy inside of him, her attitude and reactions changed towards the Beast. On the outside nothing had changed, Gaston was still the angry ugly Beast, but now Beauty had seen something, taking time to know her host, she realized he wasn’t who she taught she was and something changed for her.

There are different quotes about time. Time, they say will tell. Time heal all wounds. Time changes things and etc. It could be difficult to define time which echoes how physics define time as ‘what the clock reads’. Albert Einstein in his opinion says time is an illusion, a dividing line between the past, the present and future events.

Thinking about the story of Beauty and the Beast, one of the most important lesson I learnt that I want to share today is this principle of time, of how time is effective and can be maximized in three different areas of our lives.

Time in knowing other people

In life, we are faced with people that represent the Beast, your boss, your spouse or an annoying neighbor. It doesn’t really matter who the person is, but the principle is the same, it takes time to know anybody, no matter who they are.

In its simplest form and from the story of Beauty and the Beast, time is all that is needed to know an individual. Time helps to reveal the true core of a person which gives an in-depth knowledge of them which helps you to decide to love or not. That beastly facade could hide a kind and sensitive core. In the world today, everyone is afraid of being seen as weak and gentle, so we all hide behind that stern look, harsh words, hard demeanour to portrait who we want people to see us as. Bottom line is, never assume anything. Like it is said, nothing is truly what it appears to be. Only time would tell!

Time in professional experience

Professionally speaking, time is how you garner experience. The difference between a fresh school graduate and a consultant is time. One has invested time and energy over the years to become world sought after. Every one of us have hopes and aspirations to become the best at our careers, make lots of money and sit among the high and mighty but only a few of us want to sow time. There is no growth without an investment and to reap professionalism and command respect in your circle, you must spend time to read, listen, work, learn, re-learn. In order words, you must invest time to perfecting your art.

Time in maximizing opportunities

At the macro level, opportunities come to those who prepare. To prepare, timing is a big factor. The timing have to be just right for that big opportunity to yield its full benefit. Opportunity plus preparation equals success but preparation cannot take place absent of time and by allowing time, we are also able to know whether an opportunity is good for you or not.

In conclusion, in every aspect of life, understanding the factor of time is absolutely important and one must be patient in every endeavour to get the best of it.

For more details, you can contact the BPE team @ www.solomonempire.com or download BPE tool app on google play store.

To be a member of the BPE team of Solomon’s Empire, kindly send a mail to bpe@solomonempire.com

POSTS

POSTED ONJUNE 25, 2019EDIT”BEAUTY AND THE BEAST- A METAPHOR FOR TIME IN RELATIONSHIPS”

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST- A METAPHOR FOR TIME IN RELATIONSHIPS

Happy new week friends,

I look forward to sharing with you Brilliant and Excellent tips for attaining your goals, fulfilling your Purpose and making the world a better place.

Beauty and the Beast is one cartoon that we are all familiar with in some way. The story line is such that a young beautiful girl, Belle embarked on a trip to save her father from a hideous Beast named Gaston. This Beast however was not always a Beast, at some point in his life, he was a handsome prince, cursed by an old witch who turned him to a hideous Beast. Now Beauty does not know the history of the Beast, she did not know that he wasn’t born a Beast, Beauty did not know that he was once a handsome prince with loyal servants and a vibrant kingdom. All that Beauty knows is the present; a hideous Beast with very bad attitude and a anger that erupts very quick.

The story line took a turn when Beauty became patient with Gaston and went on a journey of discovery, finding out from the characters in the house, the kind of person he was, why he was always angry and sad at the same time. The best part of the movie was when Beauty realized who Gaston was in his core. The moment Beauty realized that beyond all the aggression and ugliness on the surface, there was beauty and joy inside of him, her attitude and reactions changed towards the Beast. On the outside nothing had changed, Gaston was still the angry ugly Beast, but now Beauty had seen something, taking time to know her host, she realized he wasn’t who she taught she was and something changed for her.

There are different quotes about time. Time, they say will tell. Time heal all wounds. Time changes things and etc. It could be difficult to define time which echoes how physics define time as ‘what the clock reads’. Albert Einstein in his opinion says time is an illusion, a dividing line between the past, the present and future events.

Thinking about the story of Beauty and the Beast, one of the most important lesson I learnt that I want to share today is this principle of time, of how time is effective and can be maximized in three different areas of our lives.

Time in knowing other people

In life, we are faced with people that represent the Beast, your boss, your spouse or an annoying neighbor. It doesn’t really matter who the person is, but the principle is the same, it takes time to know anybody, no matter who they are.

In its simplest form and from the story of Beauty and the Beast, time is all that is needed to know an individual. Time helps to reveal the true core of a person which gives an in-depth knowledge of them which helps you to decide to love or not. That beastly facade could hide a kind and sensitive core. In the world today, everyone is afraid of being seen as weak and gentle, so we all hide behind that stern look, harsh words, hard demeanour to portrait who we want people to see us as. Bottom line is, never assume anything. Like it is said, nothing is truly what it appears to be. Only time would tell!

Time in professional experience

Professionally speaking, time is how you garner experience. The difference between a fresh school graduate and a consultant is time. One has invested time and energy over the years to become world sought after. Every one of us have hopes and aspirations to become the best at our careers, make lots of money and sit among the high and mighty but only a few of us want to sow time. There is no growth without an investment and to reap professionalism and command respect in your circle, you must spend time to read, listen, work, learn, re-learn. In order words, you must invest time to perfecting your art.

Time in maximizing opportunities

At the macro level, opportunities come to those who prepare. To prepare, timing is a big factor. The timing have to be just right for that big opportunity to yield its full benefit. Opportunity plus preparation equals success but preparation cannot take place absent of time and by allowing time, we are also able to know whether an opportunity is good for you or not.

In conclusion, in every aspect of life, understanding the factor of time is absolutely important and one must be patient in every endeavour to get the best of it.

For more details, you can contact the BPE team @ www.solomonempire.com or download BPE tool app on google play store.

To be a member of the BPE team of Solomon’s Empire, kindly send a mail to bpe@solomonempire.com