Live, Act and Write

Rather than give up on the world, we can confront it directly and with passion, and create for ourselves a meaning out of the pain, loss, and struggles that we endure everyday.

I mentioned in my write up sometime ago that what motivates you today gives you the currency to purchase what you will be tomorrow. Today’s advantages must be used to buy tomorrow’s opportunities. Every person is motivated by something in particular. When you know what motivates you, life becomes an exciting adventure. You are driven by your passion and you have a reason for getting out of bed in the morning. This kind of energy is natural and essential for personal success.

“The only certainty is that we are here, in this moment, in this now. It’s up to us: to live fully, experiencing each moment, aware, alert and attentive. We are here, each one of us, to write our own story—and what fascinating stories we make!”

Dave Chappelle once said; “The hardest thing to do is to be true to yourself, especially when everybody is watching.” This is a recessive truth because fear of being looked down on or rejected makes quite a number of people live on the terms of others, hence not living the life purpose.

The reason most of us can’t be ourselves in the face of the world is that deep down we are not really sure who we really are. We’ve spent too much of our life shifting ourselves to match what others want. However, they’re few exceptions of individuals who are doing great having stopped living on the terms and expectations of people around them. Example of such is Matthew Berry

Matthew Berry is a Hollywood screenwriter turned Fantasy TV presenter. For someone who has been writing for sitcoms and movies to decide to make a career out of his fantasy sports obsession, it was more than a dream come true and a perfect example of living on one’s own term.

In his New York Times Bestseller, Fantasy Life: The Outrageous, Uplifting, and Heartbreaking World of Fantasy Sports from the Guy Who’s Lived It”, Berry noted that he was 35 years old and miserable and the only thing that made me happy was this dumb little fantasy sports website that I had started on the side.

In 2005, Berry went after his passion: fantasy sports. Appearances on radio and TV for ESPN and the NBA landed him in a meeting with ESPN vice president John Kosner. Berry persuaded Kosner to let him turn his hobby into a full-time job. Now, Berry is ESPN’s top fantasy sports analyst, spending his days playing in every type of league imaginable. The dream job has led Berry to tell Sports Business Daily, “I like my salary. But I’d do it for free.

Berry’s life trajectory is a validation of passion, purpose and owning up to one’s true self regardless of the noise from the outside world.

“Being true to oneself or Living life fully” can mean different things to different people, however regardless whatever your concept of living life is, always ensure it is done for your own sake because when the chips are down, it is your life.

Getting back on Track Post- Covid

Truth be told, I was practically out of my zone during the lockdown, and after it was lifted and I lost all motivation, vibes, and personal encouragement vibes. Nobody knew what will happen next. We saw scientists, doctors, and pastors who were only forecasting trends but not sure of the reality or what would come next.

My money was almost useless, my goals stared back at me, every moment I lived was a miracle and I took each day as it came.

All routines that seemed important in all aspects of lives from fitness routines to sleep routines and work routines changed. Consistency became history.

The current pandemic, without a doubt, has thrown nearly all of us off of our regular routines. Where and how we work is different. When and where we eat and exercise has also changed. And potentially with all of that disruption comes unhealthy changes in sleep and consumption patterns.

My sincere condolence goes to all souls lost during this period. We pray that their souls rest in perfect peace. We pray that our Land be healed and the permanent vaccine for the virus be found for this to also move to our history books.

If you are reading this, you have survived this period or you are still passing through this phase. Although the COVID-19 situation is constantly changing, and it is time to get back on track. The fact that you are reading this today should give you some confidence that, if you put in place some good study practices and set some reachable goals, you’ll be in good stead to handle whatever speed bumps are on the road ahead.

I will like to congratulate all students who participated in the online essay competition organised by my team in Nigeria during the lockdown to encourage younger Nigerians.

Osun State winner with the Deputy Governor of Osun State.
Lagos State winner with the Honourable Commissioner of Education of Lagos State.

The lucky winners were honored by the government of their states and I wish them better accomplishments in the future.

With COVID-19 restrictions being lifted across countries, World Health Organization still recommending mask-wearing, new variants of the coronavirus still spreading, people still dying daily, the virus seems to have become a necessary evil the world would have to adapt to. There have been increasing talks and takes about the ‘new normal’, but then, has the ‘old normal’ been even normal?

Pre-covid, we had global warming, international political & security challenges, financial and tech shifts etc. Post-covid, the world should expect the budding disruptions in several sectors of the world to accelerate. Just as people with preexisting medical conditions are most susceptible to the virus, the global impact of the corona virus will accelerate preexisting transitions.

Take for example, the fintech, crypotcurrency and microblogging and video tech platforms have been screeding to explore and change the course of wealth creation and development for years, COVID-19 and it multiple lockdown effects set the boom for these tech companies and today, the numbers are speaking for themselves.

Also, the pandemic has stressed fundamental questions about the competence of world super powers, especially owning to the fact that the virus emanated from China, a rapidly rising new super power threatening to displace the established USA.

Apart from the healthcare catastrophe, the most immediate challenge resulting from the COVID-19 pandemic is the economic paralysis, as many businesses have suddenly lost their customers, and wonder how long they can hold out. However, despite the lows the pandemic has created, I believe that it has so far been a blessing in disguise, and the full post-crises possibilities are yet to be untapped.

So what is the much ado about getting back on track post-covid?

1. World Economy: The economy of the world has been disproportionately impacted by the pandemic and has even exacerbated the economic disparities that have been growing between the haves and the hav nots over the past few years. However, the ‘new world economic order’ through fintech and blockchain teachnologies seeks to close this gap.

2. Business Support on Small Businesses: Small businesses are particularly hard-hit by this pandemic. Hence, there is a growing need to restore SMEs to their previous state because they are a pivotal part of the economy. Grants and loans to support small businesses and entrepreneurs has been made available by different countries, entrepreneurs should strategically position themselves to be beneficiaries of this.

3. Government: Government must as much as possible begin to think and act on cutting cost of governance. Though the recently ratified African Continental Free Trade Agreement (AfCFTA) could help each african countries can supply what it produces best to others, there is also a need to trim down the cost of governance tremendously because the country cannot continue to allocate more than 70% of its budget to accommodate the huge allowances and the extravagant expenses of those in the corridors of power.

4. Technology: After the outbreak of COVID- 19, technological advancement has been used to promote and enable the business to continue running throughout. From e-commerce to fintech, to media, to telcom, to telehealth, etc, the technological advancement during and post covid is one of the postivities to look out for going forward.

In conclusion, it is evident that like malaria and flues, coronavirus is here to stay. However, lessons learnt during the peak of the pandemic should be held to heart even as we adapt to the new normal.

Words of Wisdom from Max Ehrmann

It’s been a while friends.

Enjoy this beautiful piece as you go into the new week.

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

— Max Ehrmann, 1927

Why Effective Communication Matters

Jack and John are walking from religious service. Jack wonders whether it would be all right to smoke while praying.

John replies, “Why don’t you ask the Priest?”

So Jack goes up to the Priest and asks, “Priest, may I smoke while I pray?”

The Priest says, “No, my son, you may not. That’s utter disrespect to our religion.”

Jack goes back to his friend and tells him what the good Priest told him.

John says, “I’m not surprised. You asked the wrong question. Let me try.”

And so John goes up to the Priest and asks, “Priest, may I pray while I smoke?”
To which the Priest eagerly replies, “By all means, my son. By all means.”

“Effective communication is the bridge between confusion and clarity” – Nat Turner

It is more than just exchanging information. It’s about understanding the emotion and intentions behind the information. As well as being able to clearly convey a message, you need to also listen in a way that gains the full meaning of what’s being said and makes the other person feel heard and understood.

Vagueness and ambiguity occur when a message is not fully delivered, the sender leaves out valuable information or the receiver fails to ask clarifying questions. Ambiguity and vagueness enhance the difficulty of a task, and they diminish the ability to make decisions and solve problems. Not being able to solve the problems of customers can have a costly impact on a business.

In today’s evolving global business climate, proper communication between companies, clients, and consumers is paramount. Failure to communicate in even the smallest of ways can lead to huge delays in project deadlines, tense business relationships, and lost profits. Being able to adequately understand, avoid and remedy miscommunications in a business setting could save a business from all these headaches.

Communication is one of the essential social skills required for any individual to survive in the world. Effectively communicating ensures that you not only convey your message to someone but also let them know about your feelings and emotions. Whether it is amongst family members, friends, or office colleagues, effective communication helps individuals get through the tasks of life with ease. 

Tavakoli, a leader at Dale Carnegie Employee Training, who writes that the “Foundation for genuine employee engagement begins with extensive and effective communication… and the resulting behaviors show up in increased productivity, heightened innovation, and improved job satisfaction”.

The main skills required to effectively communicate include; listening, body language, effective speech and expression, and confidence. When these skills are not appropriately used in communication, there’s always going to be a big drop between the sender and receiver.

If you are constantly misunderstood, you need to check your communication.

To better communicate, learn the basics of nonverbal communication because the majority of what you say is communicated not through words, but physical cues.

Secondly, Get Your Point Across. When we’re trying to get a point across to someone else we often think long and hard about what we want to say. That is the wrong way to go about it. Instead of focusing on what you want to say to get your point across, you should focus on what you want the other person to hear.

Also, Listen! Being a good listener is half the equation to being a good communicator.
People who can listen to someone can then actually answer questions in a meaningful way. If you don’t make the effort to actively listen, then you are doing yourself and the other person a disservice in the communication department.

Being able to communicate effectively is perhaps the most important of all life skills.
The art of communication is a language of leadership.

The Best Way To Criticism

Once upon a time, there was a young painter who had just completed his course under disciplehood of a great painter (Master). This young artist decided to assess his skills. He decided to give his best strokes on the canvass. He took 3 days and painted beautiful scenery.

He wanted people’s opinions about his caliber and painting skills. He put his creation at a busy street-crossing. And just down below a board which read, “Gentlemen, I have painted this piece. Since I am new to this profession I might have committed some mistakes in my strokes etc. Please put a cross wherever you see a mistake.”

While he came back in the evening to collect his painting he was completely shattered to see that the whole canvass was filled with Xs (crosses) and some people had even written their comments on the painting.
Disheartened and broken completely he ran to his master’s place and burst into tears. Sobbing and crying he told his master about what happened and showed the pathetic state of his creation which was filled with crosses and correction remarks.

This young artist was breathing heavily and the master heard him saying, “I am useless and if this is what I have learned to paint I am not worth becoming a painter. People have rejected me completely. I feel like dying.”
Master smiled and suggested, “My Student, I will prove that you are a great artist and have learned a flawless painting.” The young disciple couldn’t believe it and said, “I have lost faith in myself and I don’t think I am good enough. Don’t make false hopes.”

“Do as I say without questioning it. It will work.” Master interrupted him.

Young artist reluctantly agreed and two days later early morning he presented a replica of his earlier painting to his master. Master took that gracefully and smiled.

“Come with me.” the master said.

They reached the same street-crossing early morning and displayed the same painting exactly at the same place. Now master took out another board which read, “Gentlemen, I have painted this piece. Since I am new to this profession I might have committed some mistakes in my strokes etc. I have put a box with colors and brushes just below. Please do a favor. If you see a mistake, kindly pick up the brush and correct it.” Master and disciple walked back home.

They both visited the place the same evening. The young painter was surprised to see that there was not a single correction done so far. The next day again they visited and found the painting remained untouched. They say the painting was kept there for a month for no correction came in!

This story is one of many life instances that portray how much people prefer to criticize rather than improve a person or situation.
It’s so easy to criticize other people, and so hard to give a single honest compliment. It’s so easy to see yourself in a good light and at the same time focus on the imperfections of other people.

Have you ever noticed how some people don’t think twice before criticizing someone else? Or how their tolerance level for ideas that are different from their own is practically non-existent, making them argumentative and easily angered?

Have you been in a situation where you spend a considerable amount of hours on a task thinking that you pulled a good one, only to have your work flimsily thrown back at you with a derogatory remark from your boss or supervisor and even friends? And, when you ask them to give opinions on how it could be better they go blank?

That’s how much people prefer to criticize rather than improve. Most critics only know that a task or situation can be better but can barely pinpoint how to make it better.

As a boss, supervisor, parent, team leader, or expert, there’s probably been times you discredit and make your subordinates feel they haven’t done enough.

Whatever you hope your critic statements could positively impact the lives of the person you criticize, you need to understand that people’s ability to handle criticism differs and you may never ascertain for sure the mental strength of the person you have overly criticized.

What if your harsh criticism makes them give up or pushes them over the edge? What if your derogatory remarks were the reason a person never trusted their abilities anymore?

Rather than criticize, you could give feedback. If you want to help people improve their behavior, it is worth investing your effort in learning how to help people change their behaviors, attitudes, and skills.

Criticizing people is a complete lose-lose situation that only creates distance, spreads negative energies, and causes tensions. Criticism is one of the worst kinds of negative thinking, talking, and acting.
If positive thoughts are creative thoughts of connecting, including, sharing and loving, then negative thinking is composed of thoughts and words (and consequently actions) that disconnect, exclude and spread hate.

Practice giving constructive feedback rather than criticizing. Both criticism and feedback involve evaluation. However, a key difference between feedback and criticism is that criticism involves judgment and fault-finding, where feedback evaluates and then passes on corrective information.

Na Small Thing Syndrome

Tell me are you ready o. (Ridimacoolayo) Party scatter, As they start am, People yapa, They start to dancia, But as I enter, Omo the party scatter, Party scatter, The party scatter, the party scatter….. The sound from Fireboy, one of Nigeria’s top artists kept banging. Really, the party don scatter. Buzz was coming in from left, right and center and as you will expect. The party no go sweet if girls no dey…. (Another music from Falz and Patonranking)

I was already in another world when I checked my time, it was 4:00 am. It was then it occurred to me that the morning was the finals of our state soccer match. My teammates were camped in a hotel close to the stadium but I got a waiver to stay in town that night as I was having a meeting with the scouts from Germany who came to Europe to see me play and finalize my contract signing to play soccer in Europe. The deal was successful and my agent asked that we go to a nearby pub to celebrate after they all went to sleep. I managed to get out of the club and got to the stadium as early because I never had time to sleep. When the match kicked off, the team and my coach were waiting on my excellent performance and skills to win at the finals. I struggled all through the game without any excellent touch, passes, or dribbles which had always been my best way of thrilling the fans.

My coach would pull me closer and whisper into my ears just after the match, “You are such a disappointment”, as my head fell to the ground in shame. There are several lessons to learn from this story, but one we must not ignore is the implication of overconfidence that leads to a lack of preparedness. The lack of preparation stems from either ignorance or the na-small-thing syndrome.

Na-small-thing syndrome is that undertone disease that makes us feel we can effortlessly excel at a given task even without preparation simply because we have excelled at it before or have gotten accolades for being the best at it in the past. Typically, there are many cons to being an expert. Aside from raising the bar of expectation, you realize that when you have demonstrated a level of professionalism at something, people never give you the luxury of being second best at it. They don’t expect your grease to dry. But, unbeknownst to us, the accolade feeds our ego that we soon begin to feel overconfident and infallible. Have you ever felt 100% confident in your ability to complete a task, and then failed miserably?What do you think caused you to fail?

Overconfidence refers to the phenomenon that people’s confidence in their judgments and knowledge is higher than the actual accuracy of things. Overconfidence has been called the most “pervasive and potentially catastrophic” of all the cognitive biases to which human beings fall victim. It has been blamed for lawsuits, strikes, wars, and stock market bubbles and crashes. One common example of overconfidence is how we often underestimate the time a task or project will take. We’ve all been there, answering “Sure thing!” with a nod and a grin when a customer asks if we can get something done by tomorrow.

In the story, the young man was going to seal a major deal. He was a football expert and thrilled his fans with his creative dribbles and passes. His coach loved him. He was pretty good. Good enough for overconfidence to overhaul his sense of judgment. As he sat at the pub that night, he was roped in everything that he forgot about the football match he had for the morning until it was 4 am. The writer did not express any feeling of anxiety that he had not prepared for the match rather he played it cool and casually went off to the field to thrill his fans. If it was not for overconfidence, he had no business being at the pub when he could have taken the time to practice and mentally prepare for it. That night as he was whiling away time at the pub, chances are that his opponents were aggressively practicing knowing the kind of person they were up against. They probably practiced extra hard thinking that their toughest contender would bring his A-game, new skills, and extraordinary dribbles to the match, but fortunately for them.

A downside to overconfidence is that it can cause you to make more mistakes than you would if your ego was more balanced. Thinking that you’re infallible can lead to poor decisions that cost big bucks or big dreams. The singular thought of being infallible makes you throw caution to the wind without intentionality. Many times, we find ourselves being overconfident. We have the skill. People have praised us for it and we have almost started to think we can never fail at it. A high level of confidence is usually helpful for performing tasks because it can lead you to strive for difficult goals. Overconfidence, however, often makes people no longer feel the need to invest all of their effort. The fourth villain of decision-making is overconfidence. People think they know more than they do about how the future will unfold.

To succeed, you need to learn to draw the line between being confident and being overconfident. Confidence is knowing you can make it through the day without screwing up, overconfidence is thinking you can do it again tomorrow.

The Power of the Universe -Law of Attraction.

“Under the Law of Attraction, the complete order of the Universe is determined, including everything that comes into your life and everything that you experience. It does so through the magnetic power of your thoughts.

Through the Law of Attraction, like attracts like. What you think about, you bring about. How is this so?

Under laboratory conditions, cutting-edge science has confirmed that every thought is made up of energy and has its unique frequency. And when this energy and frequency of a single thought radiates out into the Universe, it naturally interacts with the material world. Of course, it has long been known that matter, or physical objects, are also just packets of energy at the sub-microscopic, quantum level. And so, as your thought radiates out, it attracts the energy and frequencies of like thoughts, like objects, and even like people, and draws those things back to you.
It follows then that your THOUGHTS BECOME THINGS!

It’s the Law of Attraction”.

This is my favorite read from the book “The Secret” by Rhonda Byrne.

Ever heard that the universe is powerful? That there’s a force in the universe that syncs with us based on the energies we release and the thoughts we harbor? Ever heard that you get back whatever you give out to the world?

The universe is everything. It includes all of space and all the matter and energy that space contains. It even includes time itself and, of course, it includes you. The universe operates with several laws, one of which is the law of attraction.

The law of attraction is a philosophy suggesting that positive thoughts bring positive results into a person’s life, while negative thoughts bring negative outcomes. It is based on the belief that thoughts are a form of energy and that positive energy attracts success in all areas of life, including health, finances, and relationships.

It is believed that regardless of age, nationality, or religious belief, we are all susceptible to the laws which govern the Universe, including the Law of Attraction. It is the Law of Attraction that uses the power of the mind to translate whatever is in our thoughts and materialize them into reality. In basic terms, all thoughts turn into things eventually. If you focus on negative doom and gloom you will remain under that cloud. If you focus on positive thoughts and have goals that you aim to achieve you will find a way to achieve them with massive action.

If you use the internet well enough, there’s probably been a time you searched to buy a product on google, and then go on your Facebook or other social media platforms and see that item you have searched for pop up even in varieties. Although this is remarketing in the digital world, it is a real example of forces working to bring you closer to your desire.

In the same manner, there might have times you have thought about calling someone and they called you just immediately or Thought about getting a goal achieved and then happen to meet people who have the same vision in the most unlikely places.

How about a time you learned the name of somewhere new for the first time and suddenly the name is popping up everywhere that you go – on the front of magazines, on the radio, in overheard conversations.

What a coincidence you might say, but that is the power of the universe. The law of attraction!

The universe does this thing where it aligns you with people, things, situations that match the energies we put out. What this means is that the more you improve yourself and raise your vibration, the more you see things that are beneficial to your well-being.

If the law of attraction brings to life what you focus on, that leaves the question, “what are you focused on?”

Here’s how it works.

Like attracts like. If you are feeling excited, enthusiastic, passionate, happy, joyful, appreciative, or abundant, then you are sending out positive energy.

On the other hand, if you are feeling bored, anxious, stressed out, angry, resentful, or sad, you are sending out negative energy.
The universe, through the Law of Attraction, will respond enthusiastically to both of these vibrations. It doesn’t decide which one is better for you, it just responds to whatever energy you are creating, and it gives you more of the same. You get back exactly what you put out there.

Because your energy vibrations will attract energy back to you of the same frequencies, you need to make sure that you are continually sending out energy, thoughts, and feelings that resonate with what you want to be, do, and experience.
Your energy frequencies need to be in tune with what you want to attract in your life.

Once you understand the Law of Attraction and how it works, you can begin to consciously and intentionally create a better life.

You can choose to respond differently to the situations that arise during your day.
You can choose to think differently.
You can choose to focus and think about the things you want more of in your life, not the things that are not working out.
You can choose to experience more of the things that make you feel good instead of bad.
You can choose to deliberately participate in the creation of your future by managing your thoughts and feelings.

To become more intentional about the thoughts you offer the universe, you’ll need to decide what you want—but also practice feeling those emotions you’ll experience when you have it.

The law of attraction is always working whether we like it or not so we need to be conscious. We can do this by focusing on gratitude, positive thoughts, visualization of the future we so much desire. One way or the other, the universe in itself will bring together everything that needs for us to materialize our visions.

What you radiate outward in your thoughts, feelings, mental pictures, and words, you attract into your life. For this reason, be careful about the kind of energy you radiate because all that we are is a result of what we have thought.

Self Evaluation

One winter morning, when the sun was fairly up in the sky, a little boy reached on a grocery shop having telephone booth in it. He saw a soda carton; he reached to the carton and pulled it near the telephone booth. Then, he climbed onto the carton so that he could reach the buttons on the phone and proceeded to punch in ten digits (mobile numbers).

The store-owner observed and curiously listened to the conversation the boy had.
Little Boy asked, “Madam, I am a poor boy, can you give me the job of grass cutting in your lawn?”

Woman (at the other end of the phone line) replied, “Sorry, I already have someone to cut my lawn.”

Little Boy said, “Madam, I will cut your lawn for half the price of the person who cuts your lawn now.”

Woman replied, “I’m very satisfied with the person who is presently cutting my lawn. He is doing a good job.”

Little Boy (with more perseverance) said, “ Madam, I’ll even sweep your curb and your sidewalk, so on Sunday you will have the prettiest lawn in all your neighborhood.

Woman, “No, thank you.”

With a smile on his face, the little boy replaced the receiver.  

The store-owner, who was listening to all this conversation, walked over to the boy.

Store Owner said, “Son… I liked your attitude; I also liked your positive spirit and would like to offer you a job.”
Boy replied, “No, thanks. I appreciate your job offer to me”
Store Owner said, “But you were really pleading for one, when you were talking to the lady over phone.”

The little boy replied, “No Sir, I was just checking my performance at the job I already have. I am the one who is working for that lady I was talking to!’

In social psychology, self-assessment is the process of looking at oneself in order to assess aspects that are important to one’s identity. It is a procedure to systematically observe, analyze and value your own professional action and its results in order to stabilize or improve it.

Regardless of our age, at each stage of life, we should take a moment to take stock, to do a self-evaluation. We should know who we are and understand what we want. We should have asked ourselves the tough questions, see ourselves clearly, and make adjustments if necessary.

Without proper self evaluation, failure is inevitable.

You can make a self-appraisal of your personality to evaluate what you are good at and what you aren’t good at or give yourself feedback on how you are doing as a partner or parent. In other words, you can make it a psychological or social assessment. It is always a good idea to reflect on one’s behavior and actions. In the business world, or more specifically in enterprises, from an HR point of view, a self-appraisal is evaluating yourself strictly as an employee.  You judge your performance at work, completion of tasks and projects, adhering to policies, time management skills, communication skills etc.

Self-evaluation improves your self-awareness and self-control. It helps you focus on your goals and let go of behaviors and habits that don’t serve you. It can also be used as a career promotion tool. The self assessment sets the tone for your overall review conversation with your manager. It’s your opportunity to document your thoughts about your role and responsibilities, and your perception of yourself within the organization. The

One winter morning, when the sun was fairly up in the sky, a little boy reached on a grocery shop having telephone booth in it. He saw a soda carton; he reached to the carton and pulled it near the telephone booth. Then, he climbed onto the carton so that he could reach the buttons on the phone and proceeded to punch in ten digits (mobile numbers).

The store-owner observed and curiously listened to the conversation the boy had.
Little Boy asked, “Madam, I am a poor boy, can you give me the job of grass cutting in your lawn?”

Woman (at the other end of the phone line) replied, “Sorry, I already have someone to cut my lawn.”

Little Boy said, “Madam, I will cut your lawn for half the price of the person who cuts your lawn now.”

Woman replied, “I’m very satisfied with the person who is presently cutting my lawn. He is doing a good job.”

Little Boy (with more perseverance) said, “ Madam, I’ll even sweep your curb and your sidewalk, so on Sunday you will have the prettiest lawn in all your neighborhood.

Woman, “No, thank you.”

With a smile on his face, the little boy replaced the receiver.  

The store-owner, who was listening to all this conversation, walked over to the boy.

Store Owner said, “Son… I liked your attitude; I also liked your positive spirit and would like to offer you a job.”
Boy replied, “No, thanks. I appreciate your job offer to me”
Store Owner said, “But you were really pleading for one, when you were talking to the lady over phone.”

The little boy replied, “No Sir, I was just checking my performance at the job I already have. I am the one who is working for that lady I was talking to!’

In social psychology, self-assessment is the process of looking at oneself in order to assess aspects that are important to one’s identity. It is a procedure to systematically observe, analyze and value your own professional action and its results in order to stabilize or improve it.

Regardless of our age, at each stage of life, we should take a moment to take stock, to do a self-evaluation. We should know who we are and understand what we want. We should have asked ourselves the tough questions, see ourselves clearly, and make adjustments if necessary.

Without proper self evaluation, failure is inevitable. You can make a self-appraisal of your personality to evaluate what you are good at and what you aren’t good at or give yourself feedback on how you are doing as a partner or parent. In other words, you can make it a psychological or social assessment. It is always a good idea to reflect on one’s behavior and actions. In the business world, or more specifically in enterprises, from an HR point of view, a self-appraisal is evaluating yourself strictly as an employee. You judge your performance at work, completion of tasks and projects, adhering to policies, time management skills, communication skills etc.

Self-evaluation improves your self-awareness and self-control. It helps you focus on your goals and let go of behaviors and habits that don’t serve you.

Self evaluation can be used as a career promotion tool. The self assessment sets the tone for your overall review conversation with your manager. It’s your opportunity to document your thoughts about your role and responsibilities, and your perception of yourself within the organization. The self evaluation is as much about planning your professional future as it is about reflecting on your past performance, as it’s your chance to take a step back and assess the broader performance picture. You’re able to both recognize your efforts and find out where you should be building your skills to further your achievements.

The Art of Consistency

A businessman was disturbed because his company was hitting dead ends. He was not able to do his work properly and his performance chart was falling as he was getting drowned in failures. He tried and tried but couldn’t improve out of his situation. He decided to ask for help and went to a guru known to proffer solutions to people’s problems. The guru, after listening to his outcry gave him a word and told him to write it down on a small piece of paper and put it into a glass jar each day for the next 30 days.The businessman laughed, not being sure how that exercise will restore his business. “Thanks for this, you silly old man,” he said, leaving the cottage in rage. That night when he was going to sleep, he thought of trying what the guru had told him. He made a small paper chit, wrote the word, and put it inside the glass jar.

On the second day, he took out a paper chit, wrote the word, and put it inside the jar and thought how an easy task like that could solve his problem. On the third day, he got off late from work, so after dinner he slept right away without doing the task. It was the same for the fourth, fifth, and other days. Weeks had passed before he walked past the jar and remembered he did not keep up with the supposed easy task. It was at that moment he realized that the problem he encountered in his business was due to his lack of consistency.

Consistency ties directly into building habits that can positively change your behavior. When you’re consistent, you build the momentum you need to get (and stay) motivated, and make progress. By definition, consistency is referred to as adherence to the same principles in a steadfast way. When we’re consistent, it means we’re dedicated to carrying an activity or completing a task. It means we’re clear on what we want to accomplish and are taking the necessary steps to reach it. One of the reasons people fail to achieve their goal is not because they didn’t start out by doing tasks that will help them achieve it, but because they couldn’t continue with that task over time. Doing a little consistently is always going to be more effective than doing a lot inconsistently. And this holds true across any positive behavior or goal we’re attempting to achieve. It is not about how many you were able to start, but how many you saw to its end. Think about one of your goals. It requires consistent effort to push toward that goal. If you are not consistently focused on achieving it, you will likely fall back into old habits or lose interest.

Being consistent is the difference between failure and success.

The late Jim Rohn, entrepreneur and author, said: “Success is neither magical nor mysterious. Success is the natural consequence of consistently applying basic fundamentals.” If you can learn to do something consistently, you’ll tap into a much greater superpower than the habit itself: the belief that you’re completely capable of changing your behavior.Once you’re capable of changing your behavior, you’ll be capable of making massive changes because little things are done repeatedly lead to big changes in our lives. “If you are persistent, you will get it. If you are consistent, you will keep it.”This quote applies to some of the world’s greatest athletes and leaders.

The people who have made a real impact and left their mark are not necessarily the most talented or the most intelligent; they are the most consistent. In business, consistency runs deep throughout business practices and can make a real impact on how your business grows. You can have the best, most perfect strategy in the world, but if you don’t execute it consistently, it won’t do you any good. Consistency plays a role in how you interact with your customers, what you post, what visuals you use, your marketing strategy, your content, and the list goes on. It is what allows you to grow your business; the underlying secret sauce to all your strategy and your day-to-day operations.

Positive habits are hard to form, but they’re almost always worthwhile. Whether it’s eating healthy, keeping your task list at work in line, or keeping up with your industry’s news on a regular basis, positive habits can lead you to a healthier, more productive, happier life. Unfortunately, creating those habits can be problematic, as the up-front work required to introduce these actions into your already-existing routine can be disruptive. To be consistent, you first create specific and realistic goals. It’s hard to be consistent if you don’t have a strong idea of what you need to do. When starting your new path, create easy, simple goals with specific, measurable results.

Another strategy is to start small. Instead of trying to eat healthy food for every meal of every day, start with focusing on one meal — such as a salad or vegetable for lunch every day. Instead of trying a new time-blocking strategy at work every day, start out with one day of the week. Then, once you’ve gotten used to that element of your routine, start introducing it to other areas – in this case, the other meals or other days, respectively. Secondly, embrace tools that make your tasks easier. People suffer from meeting up with tasks because they go through a long route to accomplish them. Familiarizing yourself with digital tools and Apps can help you carry out specific tasks easily and in time. That way you are able to save time and focus on other tasks.

Lastly, hold yourself accountable. To be consistent you have to make sure that you recognize when you don’t reach the standards and goals that you’ve set. In these moments, consider if your goals are realistic or ask yourself what you can do to improve. On your schedule or calendar, check off tasks that you have completed. This will give you a sense of satisfaction. It will also help you realize what you can realistically accomplish in 1 day. Ask a friend, family member, mentor, or coworker to be your accountability partner. Have them check in once a while to see what your progress is like. We can accomplish anything we want in life if we have the right strategies and take the right actions consistently. When we use consistency to our advantage, it will show up in the results we create.

It’s not what we do once in a while that shapes our lives. It’s what we do consistently,”Anthony Robbins.

The Power of Association

Once, a boy fell into bad company. He mixed with bad boys and wasted his time. It hurt his father. He tried his best to set him right but to no use.
One day, the father thought of a plan. He bought some fresh apples from the bazaar. He brought one rotten apple also. He said to his son, “Put these apples in the Jide.” The boy did so.

The next day, the father asked him to bring the apples. The boy was sad to see the apples. They were all rotten the father said, “One rotten apple has spoiled all the good ones. Bad friends are like bad apples. They will spoil you.” These words of his father worked magic as Jide soon understood the impact of a negative company.

Association in psychology refers to a mental connection between concepts, events, or mental states that usually stems from specific experiences.
The power of association is very powerful. It has to do with the type of people around you and how their beliefs, vision, goals, ideas, behaviours, and thoughts affect you as an individual. It affects your thinking, habits, the way you speak, and what you do. To achieve your goals and dreams, you need to surround yourself with successful friends and mentors.

There is a beautiful explanation by Swami Vivekananda on Association, “The raindrop from the sky: If it is caught in hands, it is pure enough for drinking. If it falls in a gutter, its value drops so much that it can’t be used even for washing the feet. If it falls on a lotus leaf, it shines like a pearl and finally, if it falls on an oyster, it becomes a pearl. The drop is the same, but its existence and worth depend on whom it is associated with.

Your friends that you hang out with, along with the other people that you spend time with have a tremendous impact on you and your life. The opportunities that are available to you, the choices that you make, even the amount of money in your bank account are all greatly affected by the people around you. It’s been said that you are the average of the 5 people that you spend the most time with.

Right from childhood, we are monitored by our parents/guardians and they would tell us the kind of friends to and not to keep. They tell us who and who not to be associated with because they know how powerful association can be; the saying that bad company corrupts good manners.

You become your conversations. You will think like your associations, and your life will look a lot like the lives of the people you spend most of your time with.

Who are you spending your time with?

Do you spend your time with the talkers or doers? The motivated or indifferent?

Who you become in the next 2 to 5 years is going to be directly related to the people that you associate with. If you associate with lazy people, average people, people that believe in mediocrity, more than likely that’s where you’re going to end up in the next 2 to 5 years.
According to Colin Powell, “The Power of Association is too real: The less you associate with some people, the more your life will improve. Any time you tolerate mediocrity in others, it increases your mediocrity

Pay careful attention to who your closest associations are because it’s an indication of the direction your life is heading.
• Associations can be the people you sit and fellowship with.
• Associations can be developed by the kind of books you read.
• Associations can develop by what you watch on TV, by who you follow on social media, the internet, the kind of movies and entertainment you expose yourself to. The places you go to.

The power of association can work on the negative side or the positive side. It can work for you or it can work against you. Don’t be deceived into thinking that associating with the wrong crowd or will not affect you because personalities, words, and traits do rub off naturally.

When double checking things that impede your success, consider double-checking the friendships you keep, the kind of information you digest, what you watch and what your circle is about. If you spend time with

You must consistently ask yourself these questions: Who am I around? What are they doing to me? What have they got me saying? What have they got me reading? Where do they have me going? What do they have me thinking? And most important, what do they have me becoming?
Then you ask yourself: is that okay?
Your life does not get better by chance. It gets better by change.

It’s important to find friends and mentors who are more successful than you are. Especially, those who have achieved what you want to achieve or living the life you hope to live.

Surrounding yourself with these people will elevate your level of thinking, habits, and overall lifestyle.
These people will support you when you need help and motivate you not to give up. Be intentional about who you spend your time with. There’s a quote that says “a rising tide lifts all boats”. In this case, if the people around you are successful and achieving great things, you will too.

To change your circle of friends, you need to know what you want. Getting clear on what you want keeps you moving towards it. And it stops you from making decisions you might later regret in every area of your life even in your friendships and relationships.
What are your goals? Which type of people do you need to be associated with to help make you achieve success? What do you need to spend the most time doing for you to achieve what you want? When you gain this clarity, you can figure the kind of relationships to keep or not to keep.

Secondly, work on yourself. Being the best version of yourself is important for your mental health. If you are always depressed or indifferent, the chances are you will attract people that might not be the best influence in your life. So start by changing your outlook on life and take small steps. If you want to be associated with the motivated and goal-getters, you need to stay, motivated and be a goal-getter yourself. When you start working on yourself, you will be more present in your life which will improve your new and existing friendships and make you a better person.

Also, stay connected. It’s not enough to simply know people who could elevate you to that next level. You have to make yourself visible, reach out, communicate and hang out with these awesome individuals. Whatever it takes except stalking them and bothering them, of course!

If you desire a successful life, you need to be picky and intentional about the kind of people you associate with because bad company corrupts everything. Even the biggest visions.

Happy new month!